Misadventures in double dating

Let me begin by saying that Dan and I are not total spazzes.  Sure, Dan can exaggerate a story like Will Ferrell in character.  Yes, I definitely have a Rachel Ray on speed thing going on when I am all about something, and am at the same time a complete space cadet, forgetting what I'm saying in the middle of a story on a daily basis.  Wait, where was I?

Oh yeah, I just want to note that we generally reserve are wacky, oddball sides for close friends only.

I do believe that our veneer of sanity cracked this weekend, though.  Dan and I went on a double date with this really sweet, laid back couple Anna and Matt we've hung out with a couple of times around our city, and they decided to join us for kayaking for the day in DC on the Potomac.  The plan was kayaking, dinner, a movie, and then crashing at my parent's house since they were out of town for a wedding.  (I realize that last part sounds like the premise for an high school 80's movie.)

Anyway, kayaking started out so beautiful, with gorgeous weather and the views of all the monuments.  Anna and Matt were totally relaxed and just enjoying taking in the atmosphere.  There were ducks.  There was a light breeze.  There was the sounds of the water gently slopping at the side of the boat.

Then, I looked down and saw this about two feet away:

No, this is not my picture because I didn't have a camera with me.  And I would not have had the forthought to snap the shutter in order to document it for my blog because I was trying to keep from wetting myself.  And our snake was very, very close. But the above gentleman is about the same size as the one we saw, and our guy's head was raised out of the water like that.

Anna and Matt looked over bemused while this was going on in our kayak:

Me:  Ahh!  Snake!!  Dan!!  Row!!
Dan:  (yelping profanity under his breath).   F*&^!!  S&*^!  Holy mother &^%^&!
Me:  Dan, it's almost at our boat!  Row in the front!  I can't get my oar in the water without touching it!!
Dan:  Ahh!  Yeckkk!
Me:  Row!  Row!  Please row!  He's about to slither in our kayak!

Anna and Matt:  Hahahahahahahahah!

To be fair, we were low enough to the water that I could have seen a "Snake on a Kayak", not to be confused with the classic film Snakes on the Plane, situation going on.  Dan was pretty sheepish about the whole thing afterwards until Matt was nice enough to say something like, "It's okay, man.  Even Indiana Jones doesn't like them."  I guess that's a guy comment that loosely translates into 'You're not any less of an Alpha male seeing that bad ass Harrison Ford pretended to have a snake phobia too."

The rest of the night was nice to hang out, just pizza and 21 Jump Street and beer and talking.  Of course, this wouldn't be a "misadventure" if there wasn't one more awkward moment.  So we arrive home about 1:00 a.m. and Anna and Matt head to bed while I stayed down to clean my mom's kitchen.  I had put them in the guest room, where Dan and I always stay, because it's the best room in the house.  Anyway, after about fifteen minutes of unloading the dishwasher, I went upstairs to join Dan. 

Yes, folks, you've probably guessed where this story is going.  You see I always stay in the guest room every time I have visited my folks during the past five years, which is pretty often. I somehow completely blanked that I was supposed to be in my parents' room and that we had company and casually walked into the... wait for it... GUEST room, thinking I was just going to sleep.  Luckily, Anna and Matt were just hanging out and looked up at me all surprised, and the reality of my spaced out move slapped me suddenly in the face, and  I could barely stammer out, "I'm so, so sorry!  I always stay in this room and just forgot I was supposed to be in my parents' room!"   Mortifying.  I am seriously covering half my face as I type this.

I think the nicest thing someone can do in a situation like this is crack up, which they mercifully did when I shut the door, so at least they don't think I'm some wierdo who was trying to crash their "me time" or something. Thank goodness Anna and Matt were totally fun and hilarious and good-natured about our two spastic moments.

Anyway, just wanted to document our dumb double date moments before Dan exaggerates the snake story into "Did I mention it was a viper out for blood?"  Refer to paragraph 1.  Got to keep it real!

Pic via here