1/2 way through challenge #6: Take a creative writing class

Remember when you were back in school, and there was always that over-achiever who wrote two pages longer than was required on the teacher's topic "Best homework excuse ever" and then he or she raised his hand and smugly asked, "Is it okay that I wrote, like, two pages longer than I was supposed to?" To which the teacher responded, "Sure, (insert name of suck up here). Why don't you read first today?" And then the kid reads his story, it's pretty much awesome, and he knows it, and the class knows it, and your turn is next, and you really don't want to follow that act because, even though you skipped watching Full House to intently work on it, you know yours just isn't as good as his was?

Er... this never happened to you? Have I totally lost you? Oh, well, I'll go ahead and be a clear writer by making my point:

Every member of my adult creative writing class is that annoying over-achiever.

Their writing is Pulitzer Prize winning brilliant. I'm not even just talking about the work they have time to go home, revise, edit, show to friends, or copy straight out of a Mark Twain book. The teacher gave us ten minutes to write to the prompt "My history as a writer." I wrote about A+ term papers, my poetry instructor, and this blog. The others wrote heart-wrenching stories full of angst, metaphors, and words that I had to run home and look up.

One forty-something man read how he had created little, construction paper fantasy stories for his mom about dragons that lived in their basement. When she passed away, he found the box with every story he had every written under her bed. It was so beautiful, my eyes welled with tears.

Just to clarify, those tears were not for the poignancy of his story. They were for how much my own writing sucked in comparison! Just kidding. Kind of.

Verdict: I've been to three classes, and have three more to take. I'm going in with a more positive attitude and will update you guys soon!

Because this challenge is only half way done, I'll also come up with my "Just do it" challenge #7 soon (in the next few days). Stay turned!

Oh, and as a disclaimer, the people in my class are not nerds like the picture at the top. I just included it because it cracked me up!

The "sweaty run" list

I pushed myself to do a three mile run today. Afterward, I jogged to my car, red-faced and gasping like a woman birthing triplets, a sweaty streak down the back of my tank top, and hair plastered to nape of neck. Oh, and I had a rather distinct lump where I had wedged my car keys in my sports bra. It kind of looked like a weird third nipple was growing smack dab in the middle of my chest.

Of course, this is when I run into two high school acquaintances.

Nice.

Just do it # 5: Learn to speak survival Italian

I wanted to learn thirty phrases of survival Italian because:

1. I have the bladder of a five year old and can definitely see myself needing to ask "Dov'e la toilette???" in a panic.

2. I think Italian is the sexiest language ever. Even "Where is the bathroom?" sounds better when it's in Italian (see #1).

3. My brain is becoming mushy from constantly surfing the most insipid websites. For instance, I spent a half hour tonight checking out an amateurish soap opera that was filmed in an Ikea. (Haven't seen Ikea Heights yet? Check it out for a laugh!) Learning even a little bit of a language will be a strenuous and much-needed mental workout.

4. I want to learn a few naughty phrases to whisper to Dan (see #2). Voglio il tuo corpo...


Dan and I board a plane for Rome in approximately 28 weeks, six days, two hours, and forty minutes. Not that I'm counting down already or anything! To start to plan our trip, we went to Tuscan Brio Grille, a chain restaurant near the local mall, and ordered several $3.00 Tuscan-themed appetizers and drinks during their happy hour special. We then set up camp reading our Rick Steve's travel book and practicing our Italian with flashcards. Before anyone says anything, I realize the irony of us going to a chain restaurant rather than one of the many authentic Italian hole-in-the-wall joints in town. We went to Brio for the cheap appetizers, but kept joking about the yuppie atmosphere. Dan wittily remarked at one point, "These marble tables must date all the way back to 2007."

What the restaurant lacked in authenticity, it made up with in cheap, yummy food that fit our Italian theme. We were able to dine on beef carpaccio, braised meatballs with marscarpone polenta, "Italian" burgers, two orders of roasted red peppers and fresh mozzarella bruschetta, and wash it all down with a little vino for under twenty bucks. I'm not sure what made the Brio burger "Italian", but it was still delicious.


It was so much fun to dream, even if our trip is still so far off. We debated Sienna vs. Assisi, planned one stay in a nice hotel, and read the mouth-watering restaurant descriptions as we noshed on our chain restaurant food. To be honest, with all the gorging and planning, we certainly didn't learn all thirty phrases over dinner. At least I've made the notecards so I can practice over the next few months. After all, I've still got time.

28 weeks, six days, two hours, and forty minutes, to be exact.

Verdict of "Just do it #5": Mi dispiace, but this challenge is still in progress. I'll update again in April! I'll also update on fun trip details once we keep planning.

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For my next "Just do it Challenge #6", I'm going to take a six-week, creative writing class. This has been on my to do list for years now. The class starts Monday, and if I come up with anything decent, I may even share a bit of my writing here. I've got to say that I'm a bit nervous and hope all the other participants aren't the next Mark Twains and Ernest Hemingways...

The "cheesy songs" list

A college friend (and fellow teacher) made me a mixed c.d. to cheer me up after teacher week. It definitely brought me back to the days when my friends and I made each other mixed tapes as little presents and wrote a description for each song (such as..."Song 1 is Mariah Carey's 'Hero' because 'a hero lies in you!'")

I've been listening to her c.d. at night while I'm packing for school. Here are a few of the cheesy songs and descriptions she wrote for me:

New Kids on the Block's "Step by step" - that's how we are getting through that pacing guide

"Take a bow"- because you just dealt with someone else's kid for seven hours

Beyonce's "Irreplaceable" - Call the sub because I am replaceable

Aretha Franklin's "Respect"- Boys and Girls, can you please just give me a little?

Snap's "I've got the Power"- I have the power... to fail you! Mua ha ha ha!

The Fray's "How to save a life"- I'm trying to save lives here, but don't know if it is working

Queen's "We are the champions"- of teaching that is!

Welcome back to school!

Isn't she the funniest? Isn't there nothing like 90's song "I've got the power" to pump up a person's spirit?? :)

Just do it #4: Do a random act of kindness/ charity

Isn't this an altruistic challenge? Cue Michael Jackson's "Heal the World"!

I started brainstorming for this challenge by being practical. I didn't have much time until teacher week, which I knew would go by in a stressful blur of decorating, copying, and trying to look alert by the millionth meeting. That meant no to adopting babies, Brangelina style. I would have to nix trying to save the whales. And I definitely wasn't going to be opening the Christen Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good (and who want to do other stuff good too.)

What was this "do gooder" to do?

I decided I would start with something simple. The local school was asking for school supplies to help their large population of homeless students. I felt like this would be a very fitting act of charity, given that I'm a teacher and know how expensive those school supplies are. I can't imagine anything harder for an elementary student than being homeless: to sleep in different shelters, feel jealous of other students' new outfits and backpacks, hide embarrassment about their circumstances. And how heart-breaking must it be for a parent to send his or her student off to school unprepared?

Granted what I'm about to say reveals my nerdy side, but I remember feeling kind of excited on our annual Staples jaunt to buy school supplies, especially during elementary school. Something about my bright pink and purple Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper made the start to the new school year a bit more exciting!
(Any girls out there who went to school in the early 90's, ya'll knows what I'm talking about! Guarantee some of you had these folders, too!)

It makes me sad to think that there are many kids who miss out on all the exciting preparations to return to school, but it's easy to understand why when you start to add up the cost.

When I was perusing the school's website, I was initially shocked at the long list that each student's family was expected to buy. For instance, each kindergartner was expected to buy a bookbag, two composition books, four bottles of glue, ten (?!) glue sticks, 3 boxes of tissues, box of large Ziplocs, one three ring binder, box of small Ziplocs, wipes, three boxes of crayons, two three-tab folders, pink eraser, loose leaf, and a box of pencils. Dan and I reasoned that the school asks for more supplies than one student would ever use to compensate for the huge amounts of students who do not bring supplies. I can certainly see why lower-income families would struggle to spend $60 and up per child.

Anyhoo, one hellish trip to Walmart finagling our cart through the back-to-school crowd and a much lighter wallet later, we succeeded in outfitting one first grader for the first day of school. I hope that whoever gets these supplies will think the blinking G.I. Joe backpack is as super-cool as Dan and I hoped it would be.

Verdict: Even though it was a small act of charity, I consider Just do it #4 a success! I am disappointed that I chickened out of giving blood as my act of charity, which was my initial plan, but that will be a great challenge for later...

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For my next "Just do it Challenge", I'm going to learn to speak basic Italian. Very basic. I'm talking about two dozen or so survival phrases, like "Where's the bathroom?" and "Back off, thief!" Why the sudden interest, you may ask? Because Dan and I finally booked a nine day trip to Italy over spring break! I think Dan finally pitied me for reading all those Fodor's travel books, and we both decided to stop talking about it and just do it! (Very fitting for this challenge, don't you think?)

By my next update, I may not know all the phrases, but I plan on at least making flashcards so that I can gradually learn them over the next few months. Dan and I also have some fun theme oriented ideas about starting to plan the trip, so stay tuned for some of the details coming soon. If you've already been to Italy and have recommendations, definitely leave a comment because I would love to know about the best cities, hostels, restaurants, gelato stands, safety tips, etc. Also, if you know how the hell to pronounce "chiamo" (name), that would be helpful too!

'Til then, arrivederci!