Kickin' brass!

Don't you hate flashy, loud mouths that take over a room??

I'm talking to you, fireplace doors. You're the fixture equivalent of a Jersey Housewife.

It's Day 5 of our "staycation" (AKA spring break), and I finally decided to tweak a few things around the house that have been getting on my nerves. Please excuse the terrible photo quality in these pictures. This project turned out a lot better than it is photographing... Trust me that the unbelievably shiny brass doors were an eyesore and a pain in my ass every time I looked at them.

This is not too crazy of a DIY project, but it was time consuming. Want to try it yourself? Well, let me walk you through the oh-so-easy steps:

Step 1. Take doors off:

Step 2. Cover glass part with painter's tape and pages from Anthropologie catalogue:


Step 3. When your MIL visits and asks, "What are those pictures??" when looking at scantily clad models taped to glass, explain that they are from an Anthropologie catalogue, NOT old-fashioned porn.

(Yes, this really happened. My amazing mother-in-law thought they were pin-up girls, which cracked me up.)

Which brings me to the next step...

Step 4. Make a "tape outfit" to cover scantily clad model and avoid further scandalizing visitors:

Step 5. Slack off for a few days.

Step 6: Bring doors outside and spray with thin, even layers of fire-resistant paint. Complain that fire resistant paint doesn't come in any color except white or black.

Step 7: Let dry.

Step 8: Scrub out fireplace and fill with candles. Put doors back on.

Step 9: Take pictures for blog!

The picture doesn't really show the marked difference, but I have to say that I've very happy with the results.


Alternative titles for this post:

"Brassy to classy"

"Appealing to the brasses"

(that one doesn't even make sense)

and my favorite from Dan:

"Back that brass up!"